Funny Birthday Quotes

Welcome to the Funny Birthday Quotes webpage that will make you smile and help you to find the words to write in a card or say.
If things get better with age,then you are approaching Magnificent.You'll find lots more beyond so!
These are free for you to use for non commercial purpose











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There is still no cure for the common birthday.
John Glenn

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"Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn't matter."
Jack Benny

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"Age deosn't matter, unless your cheese."
John Paul Getty

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When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie Allen

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Phone answering machine message - '..If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key...'
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

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Your birthday is no day to be worrying that you started out with nothing, and still have most of it.

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Getting older some women take a tonic- I just have the gin.

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BEFORE YOUR BIRTHDAY PARTY

Well ya see, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can
only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. So when the
herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at
the back that are killed first. This natural selection
is good for the herd as a whole, because the general
speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by
the regular killing of the weakest members. In much
the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast
as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol,
as we know, kills brain cells. Naturally, it attacks
the slowest and weakest brain cells first.In this way,
regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain
cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SMART ASS!

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& then
You'll be as busy as a one armed paper hanger
Charlie Cox

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